The need for control in emotionally insecure mania

Photo by Lysander Yuen on Unsplash

As censureship tightens up the noose - a display of supreme insecurity by people who lack some basic human relationship skills, I notice apart from a breach of my human rights to comment on publicly available documentation and the inconvenience, there’s also the opportunity to consider the psychology of the people who order censureship and control.

The article yesterday described the handling of the Waikeria Prison riot from a perspective of preventability rather than from a need to spend millions of dollars on expensive security and training of officers. Notably the two main TV channels prevented reporters revealing just how long people were left in their cells after the fires were started (6 and a half hours) and that 2 people were carried out semi conscious. But despite that, the Corrections staff member fronting the debacle (no sign of Jeremy Lightfoot… light of foot when the shit hits the fan) says that even after all this expense they don’t believe they can prevent a riot from occurring.

Well he is probably right because the crux of the issue doesn’t lie in security, it lies in the Department’s inability to follow a legislated mandate to provide humane incarceration and it also lies in the inability of senior management in being able to conduct human relationships that are respectful. The physical living conditions and the culture of Corrections are anything but humane. Whilst Waikeria is described as the worst of the worst, my experience of visiting people in the pods of Rimutaka prison and at Paparoa prison in Christchurch was not a hell of a lot different from those descriptions.

Then it becomes clear that the huge amount spent on Hokai Rangi was always intended as a tick box exercise to cover their arses judging from the comments from staff and the expectation that it is OK to have uncovered toilets in a cramped double bunked cell and expect people to live in the same space.

Of the 212 high security prisoners in the Top Jail, nearly half (101) haven’t actually been convicted of an offence. Last I knew was that the underlying premise of justice is that you are innocent until you are proven guilty. Then half of these men being held in appalling conditions were possibly innocent of alleged offending.

It’s also worthwhile considering in light of the ongoing sensationalism of gangs that of the 77 men from the Mongrel Mob and Black Power gang members held in this unit, only 1 man was involved in the riot. These were the majority of gang members in the Top Jail Unit.

But for our friends with the need for control of both operations and the narrative, these facts don’t suit their purposes so as much as possible they have to suppress them. Sad really for what it says about how distanced they are from their own humanity. Sad that as much as Corrections and the Government try to hide it, the State has caused most of these offenders to become criminals. Just as they want to hide the fact 2 men were semi conscious after 6 and half hours of smoke inhalation, just as they have hidden the fact that someone has died in transitional accommodation likely from suicide from the hopelessness and helplessness that is fostered by the property mega rental culture, just as they want to hide the fact of their terrible inability to engage humanely with people. They only have one strategy which is to dominate using emotional intimidation from an arrogant superiority and yet look how easily Nicola Willis is wrongfooted by the most simple of questions - not wanting to display her racisim publicly and affect her ratings.

It’s exactly the same culture in clinical psychology - people are attracted to the manualised way of dealing with others because it feels safe to them, they can feel in control. But when a man complains about inappropriate sexual conduct by this registered psychologist, they are caught off guard. They only know to squash the complaint and to either demean the complainant or as in the case of the clinical psychologist manager, to give him private sessions to presumably persuade him to withdraw the complaint. It never occurs to them to see the complaint as an opportunity to improve service delivery, staff training and readiness to work in a prison environment or whether staff behaviour needs addressing and the staff’s unresolved trauma.

Same culture here with the Salvation Army, seemingly unable to respond to complaints about privacy breaches, loss of personal property and intimidation. A lack of paperwork spelling out their processes and what actually people are signing up to. I see that others are experiencing the culture as invasive as reported in the Otago Daily Times. Same culture in mental health settings, this desire to dominate to cover up their own fear. That domination is taking some extreme forms where people are over medicated, over regulated and trained to see themselves as inferior beings. It’s ironic that this need for dominance actually hides people’s deep insecurity from themselves. But it doesn’t take much for that to be revealed to them - a complaint, feedback, difference of opinion, an expected outcome of their management, the effects in their own intimate relationships.

Management positions by definition surely require role reversal, the ability to put oneself in the shoes of the other and consider how we would feel in that situation in order to achieve management success as a team. Wouldn’t it have been great if Jeremy Lightfoot, instead of imposing more British colonialism, had been able to imagine what it would be like to be locked up in a tiny dark space for 18 hours a day and considered how he might make that a more humane experience for someone. If he or whoever heard about the extent of the fires, had said at 4pm, lets prioritise people’s safety and well being and get them out of harm’s way. If when they had had the call from Newshub, had said yes this was expected due to those conditions, lets meet with the leaders of this group with the kaumatua and kuia and see what could be done.

To do so would mean acknowledging there are problems under their watch and having an attitude of welcoming complaints as an opportunity to change how things are done, the pressures staff and prisoners were under, to engage in a process of acknowledging that people who use the services provided, have the best feedback about what isn’t working.

But no it’s all too frightening for senior management to acknowledge their own deficiencies of practice, their main concern was covering their own asses and trying to maintain domination and by taking that approach they completely blocked out the needs of all the people their lack of action was affecting. The people they are paid extremely well to manage. Their own staff seemingly just as dispensable as the prisoners - I know that from how I was treated as an employee ( legitimate pay scales were ignored, left to run the group on my own for 2 weeks without support or extra pay, constant rule changes, bureaucracy and meetings) and from the number of employment cases against the Department. All to hide the insecurities of those at the top of the organisation about their inability to manage.

They run the risk of always having to look over their shoulder for the last person that they behaved badly with. They run the risk of the abuses and dishonesty, the bribes and the bullying being exposed. And the way they deal with that is to do everything faster and make themself as important and as powerful as possible. But they seem unaware that nothing ever lasts and things come back and bite you in the bum. They seem completely unable to see any other option.

The culture in management is one of self absorption - of how important you are, how many meetings you have to attend, how many staff you have, how many rental properties you have…. a life that seems plastic and fake and likely needing of artificial stimulants in order to manage. This fast track legislation and suddenly called meetings, K Arnold called urgently to her employers in Christchurch whilst she is apparently on leave… they are signs of a corporate culture that reeks of artificial stimulants, of mania, fakeness, appearances, the speed drugs, pressure, extortion, who you know, blackmail, smear campaigns. (Interesting how the drug dog was so interested in Christopher Luxon in Fiji)…. It is the classic addictive cycle of instant egoic gratification with no consideration for the people you are paid to be responsible for; outcomes or longer term effects. is just go go go….the next media release, product/logo launch, meeting, the next development - and problems/difficult people, they are to be got rid of. Whether that’s by bullying them out of their jobs, locking them up or preventing them from using a word like psychologist that describes their academic and experiential knowledge and skills.

But when the shit hits the fan….it’s all frozen indecision upstairs because people are just so habituated to controlling everything and they have so much to hide. They know deep inside that there is much to feel ashamed about but rather than facing it they just keep turning to domination as a short term strategy. The damages pile up behind them. ….and one day it will be too much. One person will open their mouth and tell all. Maybe their body will break down. Maybe their children will come to dislike who they have become and how they behave. Maybe the demands of the addiction will have overpowered them.

They have no idea of flexibility within relationships, in fact it scares them the idea of equality because they have invested so much of their identity in being superior and more powerful. Their relationships are based on power, whether that’s increasing their own or greasing up to those who have power and doing their bidding. There is something very undignified about that schoolyard behaviour in adult men and women in their Italian suits, fake tans, false laughs and loud voices screaming look at me and the big trucks that they seem unable to park.

But hey, people don’t want to listen to me or are prevented from listening to the truth. It’s ironic that they view me as such a threat, when really I am trying to help provide an alternative to the inevitable fall from domination to the pit of shame. That alternative is to develop the skills and capacity to engage in equal respectful relationships. A lot cheaper in the long run in terms of money and damage to humans and the environment but it does involve an investment in vulnerability and humanity. And that old adage that behind the facade of the bully, lies a coward may likely be true. Lets hope that they can find some courage to face the truth about their behaviour because it is behaviour that they learned in order to cope with what must have been pretty grim beginnings. It is not the truth of who they are as human beings.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash